Aging in a Culture Obsessed with Youth [TGC Podcast Ep. 401]

before we get started will you guys before we get started will you guys share your ages with everyone I feel share your ages with everyone I feel share your ages with everyone I feel like that's important right we're going like that's important right we're going like that's important right we're going to do to do to do it I'm 55 I have four it I'm 55 I have four it I'm 55 I have four grandkids I'm 51 and my daughters are grandkids I'm 51 and my daughters are grandkids I'm 51 and my daughters are all sitting on the front row yeah wait all sitting on the front row yeah wait all sitting on the front row yeah wait my daughters are over there and my sisters I should say okay there and my sisters I should say okay well I just want to know if y'all were well I just want to know if y'all were well I just want to know if y'all were listening this morning how old am I I'm listening this morning how old am I I'm listening this morning how old am I I'm 5 56 I got five kids and I have no idea 5 56 I got five kids and I have no idea 5 56 I got five kids and I have no idea if my daughters or daughter-in-laws are if my daughters or daughter-in-laws are if my daughters or daughter-in-laws are in the room but awesome and I'm 50 as I said I'm the awesome and I'm 50 as I said I'm the baby I'm young I'm still young right um baby I'm young I'm still young right um baby I'm young I'm still young right um and I don't know if my are my girls here and I don't know if my are my girls here and I don't know if my are my girls here [Laughter] [Laughter] [Laughter] nope girls are the best they are nope girls are the best they are nope girls are the best they are loved well I feel like I should say my loved well I feel like I should say my loved well I feel like I should say my age too but thankfully I'm the host I age too but thankfully I'm the host I age too but thankfully I'm the host I don't know what it's like to age so I am don't know what it's like to age so I am don't know what it's like to age so I am 37 and my mom is in the room my kids are 37 and my mom is in the room my kids are 37 and my mom is in the room my kids are not old enough to probably be in this not old enough to probably be in this not old enough to probably be in this room so but she's not cheering for me at room so but she's not cheering for me at room so but she's not cheering for me at all so all so all so that's okay to kick it off you know I that's okay to kick it off you know I that's okay to kick it off you know I want to go back because um when we were want to go back because um when we were want to go back because um when we were planning the session we all got together planning the session we all got together planning the session we all got together on a zoom call and chatted a little bit on a zoom call and chatted a little bit on a zoom call and chatted a little bit and one of the things that um you said and one of the things that um you said and one of the things that um you said Melissa really stuck out to me you said Melissa really stuck out to me you said Melissa really stuck out to me you said you know it's kind of hard to be on this you know it's kind of hard to be on this you know it's kind of hard to be on this panel it's hard to be asked for that and panel it's hard to be asked for that and panel it's hard to be asked for that and can you just tell the audience a little can you just tell the audience a little can you just tell the audience a little bit like why is it hard to serve on a bit like why is it hard to serve on a bit like why is it hard to serve on a panel like this um why why' you make

panel like this um why why' you make panel like this um why why' you make that comment um I think one reason I that comment um I think one reason I that comment um I think one reason I think it's it's hard in two different think it's it's hard in two different think it's it's hard in two different senses I think publicly it's hard and senses I think publicly it's hard and senses I think publicly it's hard and then privately it's hard so publicly I then privately it's hard so publicly I then privately it's hard so publicly I think what all of us are concerned about think what all of us are concerned about think what all of us are concerned about being on a panel like this is um that we being on a panel like this is um that we being on a panel like this is um that we say something up here that becomes a law say something up here that becomes a law say something up here that becomes a law for other people you know I mean I know for other people you know I mean I know for other people you know I mean I know Billy Graham had a rule right and I Billy Graham had a rule right and I Billy Graham had a rule right and I don't even know if he called it if he don't even know if he called it if he don't even know if he called it if he ever thought of it that way he just had ever thought of it that way he just had ever thought of it that way he just had a conviction that he was choosing to a conviction that he was choosing to a conviction that he was choosing to live by and yet it sparked this whole live by and yet it sparked this whole live by and yet it sparked this whole you know Billy Graham Ru and so I think you know Billy Graham Ru and so I think you know Billy Graham Ru and so I think none of us would want to say anything up none of us would want to say anything up none of us would want to say anything up here that would become well you know here that would become well you know here that would become well you know Courtney doctor said you know whatever Courtney doctor said you know whatever Courtney doctor said you know whatever about whatever topic that we might about whatever topic that we might about whatever topic that we might discuss you know when it comes to aging discuss you know when it comes to aging discuss you know when it comes to aging and so I think it's really difficult we and so I think it's really difficult we and so I think it's really difficult we want to say this is a discipleship issue want to say this is a discipleship issue want to say this is a discipleship issue that is very very that is very very that is very very important um and it it does matter what important um and it it does matter what important um and it it does matter what we think about these things and how we we think about these things and how we we think about these things and how we discuss it but we all should be doing discuss it but we all should be doing discuss it but we all should be doing that as we're in the word and we're that as we're in the word and we're that as we're in the word and we're talking to God and we're prayerfully talking to God and we're prayerfully talking to God and we're prayerfully thinking about these things not just thinking about these things not just thinking about these things not just because someone on a panel said it and because someone on a panel said it and because someone on a panel said it and then privately I would just say it's then privately I would just say it's then privately I would just say it's it's a difficult thing I mean it it it's a difficult thing I mean it it it's a difficult thing I mean it it really is something we all deal with really is something we all deal with really is something we all deal with this is personal um I feel like I went this is personal um I feel like I went this is personal um I feel like I went from oh wow you're the speaker you have from oh wow you're the speaker you have from oh wow you're the speaker you have kids you know like because you're so kids you know like because you're so kids you know like because you're so young to no one says that anymore and

young to no one says that anymore and young to no one says that anymore and all of the sudden you're like huh am I all of the sudden you're like huh am I all of the sudden you're like huh am I just completely outdated and people want just completely outdated and people want just completely outdated and people want to hear the younger people so it it to hear the younger people so it it to hear the younger people so it it changes so quickly you're like I thought changes so quickly you're like I thought changes so quickly you're like I thought there was going to be a little longer there was going to be a little longer there was going to be a little longer season where it was just the right spot season where it was just the right spot season where it was just the right spot and um so it is personal you start to and um so it is personal you start to and um so it is personal you start to wonder um and it can take a lot of work wonder um and it can take a lot of work wonder um and it can take a lot of work just to say oh wow she hasn't let just to say oh wow she hasn't let just to say oh wow she hasn't let herself completely go just to look halfway normal so no I I go just to look halfway normal so no I I I I feel that Melissa New Normal yeah I I I feel that Melissa New Normal yeah I I I feel that Melissa New Normal yeah I I I feel that so much because in the I I feel that so much because in the I I feel that so much because in the black community you know there's a there black community you know there's a there black community you know there's a there was a time when everybody called me sis was a time when everybody called me sis was a time when everybody called me sis like hey sis what's up sis now is what's like hey sis what's up sis now is what's like hey sis what's up sis now is what's up auntie and I'm like what I can't even auntie and I'm like what I can't even buy a sis but it's sis but it's fine it's it's fine it's it's fine it's it's fine somebody called me Mama Jen and I fine somebody called me Mama Jen and I fine somebody called me Mama Jen and I was like are we related well building off of that I related well building off of that I think Courtney I would love for you to think Courtney I would love for you to think Courtney I would love for you to speak a little bit about life speak a little bit about life speak a little bit about life experiences things comments like this or experiences things comments like this or experiences things comments like this or other things in our life how does that other things in our life how does that other things in our life how does that shape how we think about aging yeah I shape how we think about aging yeah I shape how we think about aging yeah I think we all come from you know we have think we all come from you know we have think we all come from you know we have a we have a family of origin story and a we have a family of origin story and a we have a family of origin story and we have you know the things that have we have you know the things that have we have you know the things that have shaped our stories whether it's the shaped our stories whether it's the shaped our stories whether it's the culture we live in or the subculture we culture we live in or the subculture we culture we live in or the subculture we live in you know there are different live in you know there are different live in you know there are different parts of the country that are going to parts of the country that are going to parts of the country that are going to Value different things more but there

Value different things more but there Value different things more but there are every family of origin has are every family of origin has are every family of origin has values um that are taught explicitly and values um that are taught explicitly and values um that are taught explicitly and implicitly and that's going to shape how implicitly and that's going to shape how implicitly and that's going to shape how we view our physicality it's going to we view our physicality it's going to we view our physicality it's going to shape how we view our body how we shape shape how we view our body how we shape shape how we view our body how we shape it's going to shape how we view what we it's going to shape how we view what we it's going to shape how we view what we think of beauty and what what beauty is think of beauty and what what beauty is think of beauty and what what beauty is and what beauty does I think that's and what beauty does I think that's and what beauty does I think that's something we're going to be talking a something we're going to be talking a something we're going to be talking a little bit about here sort of that little bit about here sort of that little bit about here sort of that that um street cred of beauty and and that um street cred of beauty and and that um street cred of beauty and and how important it is uh I think that how important it is uh I think that how important it is uh I think that areas of affirmation play into how we areas of affirmation play into how we areas of affirmation play into how we think about this and also areas of think about this and also areas of think about this and also areas of desired affirmation the thing we always desired affirmation the thing we always desired affirmation the thing we always wanted to hear but didn't I think that wanted to hear but didn't I think that wanted to hear but didn't I think that plays into it our current friend groups plays into it our current friend groups plays into it our current friend groups I mean they shape completely shape how I mean they shape completely shape how I mean they shape completely shape how we think about things like this and we think about things like this and we think about things like this and what's normalized and what's exalt and what's normalized and what's exalt and what's normalized and what's exalt and what's valued and what's worked for and what's valued and what's worked for and what's valued and what's worked for and then I think the other thing is so if then I think the other thing is so if then I think the other thing is so if we're looking you know in our past to we're looking you know in our past to we're looking you know in our past to our family you know our story of origin our family you know our story of origin our family you know our story of origin and then we're looking currently who and then we're looking currently who and then we're looking currently who we're kind of hanging out with I think we're kind of hanging out with I think we're kind of hanging out with I think we also need to look and see have you we also need to look and see have you we also need to look and see have you seen anybody age well and what did it seen anybody age well and what did it seen anybody age well and what did it look like and what did that do for you look like and what did that do for you look like and what did that do for you and what do you long for in how they did and what do you long for in how they did and what do you long for in how they did that so I think there's a past present that so I think there's a past present that so I think there's a past present and future aspect that really shapes how and future aspect that really shapes how and future aspect that really shapes how we think about this topic yeah I love we think about this topic yeah I love we think about this topic yeah I love that those are all like different topics that those are all like different topics that those are all like different topics that we want to dig into today and I that we want to dig into today and I that we want to dig into today and I appreciate that you mentioned Beauty appreciate that you mentioned Beauty appreciate that you mentioned Beauty because I know that's in a a Women's

because I know that's in a a Women's because I know that's in a a Women's Conference that has to be discussed Conference that has to be discussed Conference that has to be discussed right we need to talk about the beauty right we need to talk about the beauty right we need to talk about the beauty question so Jen I'd love if you could question so Jen I'd love if you could question so Jen I'd love if you could talk to us a little bit about beauty and talk to us a little bit about beauty and talk to us a little bit about beauty and aging um and how are views on beauty and aging um and how are views on beauty and aging um and how are views on beauty and aging are influenced by modern day aging are influenced by modern day aging are influenced by modern day culture and why is it so important to culture and why is it so important to culture and why is it so important to allow ourselves to age naturally oh allow ourselves to age naturally oh allow ourselves to age naturally oh thanks for the easy thanks for the easy thanks for the easy question uh yeah so um I I would just question uh yeah so um I I would just question uh yeah so um I I would just pose the question to you guys like turn pose the question to you guys like turn pose the question to you guys like turn to your neighbor and say what you think to your neighbor and say what you think to your neighbor and say what you think the biggest influence is currently on the biggest influence is currently on the biggest influence is currently on the way people are perceiving Beauty do the way people are perceiving Beauty do the way people are perceiving Beauty do it I'm hearing the word I heard social it I'm hearing the word I heard social it I'm hearing the word I heard social media right I heard I heard Instagram yeah so we we all know and I Instagram yeah so we we all know and I just I want to get that just I want to get that just I want to get that out oh you had long answers that's out oh you had long answers that's out oh you had long answers that's good look and another thing good look and another thing good look and another thing um I want to get that out in the open at um I want to get that out in the open at um I want to get that out in the open at the outset because um often when the outset because um often when the outset because um often when conversations about like what what I conversations about like what what I conversations about like what what I want for my body when we have those want for my body when we have those want for my body when we have those conversations with someone else we do conversations with someone else we do conversations with someone else we do tend to communicate it like it's a tend to communicate it like it's a tend to communicate it like it's a discussion that's happening in a vacuum discussion that's happening in a vacuum discussion that's happening in a vacuum and by turning your neighbor and and by turning your neighbor and and by turning your neighbor and acknowledging nope we're all actually acknowledging nope we're all actually acknowledging nope we're all actually being shaped by the images that we're being shaped by the images that we're being shaped by the images that we're spending time gazing on on social media spending time gazing on on social media spending time gazing on on social media or wherever it is um then then what or wherever it is um then then what or wherever it is um then then what we've just said is this conversation we've just said is this conversation we've just said is this conversation isn't happening in a vacuum um um I have isn't happening in a vacuum um um I have isn't happening in a vacuum um um I have um I have adopted the phrase not um I have adopted the phrase not um I have adopted the phrase not original to me but we become what we original to me but we become what we original to me but we become what we behold we all know that we are created

behold we all know that we are created behold we all know that we are created to imitate uh it's just a question of to imitate uh it's just a question of to imitate uh it's just a question of what we will imitate and so I do want to what we will imitate and so I do want to what we will imitate and so I do want to acknowledge at the outset of this acknowledge at the outset of this acknowledge at the outset of this conversation that your current conversation that your current conversation that your current perception of how you should look um at perception of how you should look um at perception of how you should look um at any age is heavily shaped by where any age is heavily shaped by where any age is heavily shaped by where you've been casting your gaze and we're you've been casting your gaze and we're you've been casting your gaze and we're all casting our gay somewhere I include all casting our gay somewhere I include all casting our gay somewhere I include myself in that okay um but I do think myself in that okay um but I do think myself in that okay um but I do think that it brings to the Forefront why it's that it brings to the Forefront why it's that it brings to the Forefront why it's important for us to be casting our Gaze important for us to be casting our Gaze important for us to be casting our Gaze on women who are making different on women who are making different on women who are making different choices than Instagram influencers might choices than Instagram influencers might choices than Instagram influencers might be presenting to you um one of the be presenting to you um one of the be presenting to you um one of the things that I try to remind myself of in things that I try to remind myself of in things that I try to remind myself of in this conversation and this is again this this conversation and this is again this this conversation and this is again this is for me personally so if this hits you is for me personally so if this hits you is for me personally so if this hits you too heavily that I'm I am sharing my too heavily that I'm I am sharing my too heavily that I'm I am sharing my personal um process that I go through to personal um process that I go through to personal um process that I go through to try to orient myself you feel free to try to orient myself you feel free to try to orient myself you feel free to adapt this however you need to but I adapt this however you need to but I adapt this however you need to but I remember seeing a picture of Mother remember seeing a picture of Mother remember seeing a picture of Mother Teresa uh when she was advanced in years Teresa uh when she was advanced in years Teresa uh when she was advanced in years and I try to imagine myself sitting down and I try to imagine myself sitting down and I try to imagine myself sitting down and having a conversation with her about and having a conversation with her about and having a conversation with her about how I'm thinking about my appearance as how I'm thinking about my appearance as how I'm thinking about my appearance as I age and how she would respond to I age and how she would respond to I age and how she would respond to me and it helps me and I'm not we don't me and it helps me and I'm not we don't me and it helps me and I'm not we don't all have to I am not Mother Teresa uh all have to I am not Mother Teresa uh all have to I am not Mother Teresa uh and she was in a different you know and she was in a different you know and she was in a different you know context than I'm in there are a lot of context than I'm in there are a lot of context than I'm in there are a lot of um things that aren't parallels but I do um things that aren't parallels but I do um things that aren't parallels but I do think it just kind of gives like it's think it just kind of gives like it's think it just kind of gives like it's like dumping cold water on my head a like dumping cold water on my head a like dumping cold water on my head a little which is what you need when you little which is what you need when you little which is what you need when you you have been lulled into a rhythm that you have been lulled into a rhythm that you have been lulled into a rhythm that might not be supporting a Christian might not be supporting a Christian might not be supporting a Christian ethic uh and so I do think just to

ethic uh and so I do think just to ethic uh and so I do think just to acknowledge the forces that are driving acknowledge the forces that are driving acknowledge the forces that are driving us and then you know you think about um us and then you know you think about um us and then you know you think about um what a gift it is to be given years what a gift it is to be given years what a gift it is to be given years anyone who has ever lost someone um at anyone who has ever lost someone um at anyone who has ever lost someone um at an early age knows that when you start an early age knows that when you start an early age knows that when you start to get gray hairs you're thinking about to get gray hairs you're thinking about to get gray hairs you're thinking about how that person never got to get them how that person never got to get them how that person never got to get them and so um when I see gray hair coming in and so um when I see gray hair coming in and so um when I see gray hair coming in that's what I remind myself of this is a that's what I remind myself of this is a that's what I remind myself of this is a gift you know this is a gift to me and gift you know this is a gift to me and gift you know this is a gift to me and um if I look in the mirror and I never um if I look in the mirror and I never um if I look in the mirror and I never see you know we become what we behold see you know we become what we behold see you know we become what we behold well part of it is beholding yourself well part of it is beholding yourself well part of it is beholding yourself and your own changing image in the and your own changing image in the and your own changing image in the mirror and recognizing oh I know why my mirror and recognizing oh I know why my mirror and recognizing oh I know why my forehead has lines on it it's because of forehead has lines on it it's because of forehead has lines on it it's because of that third child um I just realized my that third child um I just realized my that third child um I just realized my third child is in the room honey that third child is in the room honey that third child is in the room honey that was just an example that's not really was just an example that's not really was just an example that's not really you're a you're a you're a delight delight delight um you know what I'm saying though I um you know what I'm saying though I um you know what I'm saying though I mean and mean and mean and and and so I I try to remind myself and and and so I I try to remind myself and and and so I I try to remind myself and then the other thing that I try to then the other thing that I try to then the other thing that I try to remind myself of I'm sorry my answer is remind myself of I'm sorry my answer is remind myself of I'm sorry my answer is getting a little long um is um I think getting a little long um is um I think getting a little long um is um I think about Christ's resurrected about Christ's resurrected about Christ's resurrected body uh I think when we think about body uh I think when we think about body uh I think when we think about receiving new bodies in the new heavens receiving new bodies in the new heavens receiving new bodies in the new heavens and the new Earth We're picturing and the new Earth We're picturing and the new Earth We're picturing whoever that Instagram influencer is whoever that Instagram influencer is whoever that Instagram influencer is like I'm finally going to have that body like I'm finally going to have that body like I'm finally going to have that body but Christ's resurrected body bore the but Christ's resurrected body bore the but Christ's resurrected body bore the marks of his Earthly work marks of his Earthly work marks of his Earthly work so I don't know what my resurrected body so I don't know what my resurrected body so I don't know what my resurrected body is going to be like but part of me is going to be like but part of me is going to be like but part of me wonders if it won't still bear some wonders if it won't still bear some wonders if it won't still bear some reminder marks on it um and if everybody

reminder marks on it um and if everybody reminder marks on it um and if everybody is Kim Kardashian ain't nobody Kim is Kim Kardashian ain't nobody Kim is Kim Kardashian ain't nobody Kim Kardashian so I don't think we're all Kardashian so I don't think we're all Kardashian so I don't think we're all going to be super models because what going to be super models because what going to be super models because what would be the point and we're created to would be the point and we're created to would be the point and we're created to be you know individuals and be ourselves be you know individuals and be ourselves be you know individuals and be ourselves so I just don't know that when we think so I just don't know that when we think so I just don't know that when we think about aging we are giving credit for all about aging we are giving credit for all about aging we are giving credit for all of the good that can come from of the good that can come from of the good that can come from acknowledging the passage of time um acknowledging the passage of time um acknowledging the passage of time um which is actually a Biblical principle which is actually a Biblical principle which is actually a Biblical principle so yeah those are some of the thoughts so yeah those are some of the thoughts so yeah those are some of the thoughts that I'm having and and maybe those that I'm having and and maybe those that I'm having and and maybe those scars remain because they're beautiful scars remain because they're beautiful scars remain because they're beautiful and we'll actually be able to see the and we'll actually be able to see the and we'll actually be able to see the beauty of of of the aging process just beauty of of of the aging process just beauty of of of the aging process just like just like you were saying but I like just like you were saying but I like just like you were saying but I think part of it when you were saying think part of it when you were saying think part of it when you were saying the Mother Teresa thing I think we also the Mother Teresa thing I think we also the Mother Teresa thing I think we also sell all of ourselves short because we sell all of ourselves short because we sell all of ourselves short because we think oh yeah well I'm not Mother Teresa think oh yeah well I'm not Mother Teresa think oh yeah well I'm not Mother Teresa so it doesn't matter what I do with my so it doesn't matter what I do with my so it doesn't matter what I do with my body body body whereas every single one of us is whereas every single one of us is whereas every single one of us is influencing you you know you think oh influencing you you know you think oh influencing you you know you think oh I'm not an influencer but every decision I'm not an influencer but every decision I'm not an influencer but every decision I make is influencing what my daughters I make is influencing what my daughters I make is influencing what my daughters will think is normal what their friends will think is normal what their friends will think is normal what their friends will think is normal Sons our sons will will think is normal Sons our sons will will think is normal Sons our sons will think is normal and I think we have to think is normal and I think we have to think is normal and I think we have to bear that responsibility we are all bear that responsibility we are all bear that responsibility we are all influencing someone and it matters what influencing someone and it matters what influencing someone and it matters what what I choose to do it's not just my what I choose to do it's not just my what I choose to do it's not just my choice you know yeah I would I would add choice you know yeah I would I would add choice you know yeah I would I would add to that I think with culture we're to that I think with culture we're to that I think with culture we're always acting on culture and culture is always acting on culture and culture is always acting on culture and culture is always acting on us and so it's not just always acting on us and so it's not just always acting on us and so it's not just a one-way thing and so we you know we a one-way thing and so we you know we a one-way thing and so we you know we can feel as though we are so influenced

can feel as though we are so influenced can feel as though we are so influenced by social media that we don't really by social media that we don't really by social media that we don't really have any advocacy in that uh any agency have any advocacy in that uh any agency have any advocacy in that uh any agency in that and we do the truth is we do um in that and we do the truth is we do um in that and we do the truth is we do um and so we have our spheres of influence and so we have our spheres of influence and so we have our spheres of influence we have people that we are affecting in we have people that we are affecting in we have people that we are affecting in just how we live whether we're saying just how we live whether we're saying just how we live whether we're saying anything or not anything or not anything or not yeah is there anything else you guys yeah is there anything else you guys yeah is there anything else you guys would like to add around around the would like to add around around the would like to add around around the message we're sending to kids and to message we're sending to kids and to message we're sending to kids and to boys and to to girls because I think boys and to to girls because I think boys and to to girls because I think about my little girl at 9 and six and about my little girl at 9 and six and about my little girl at 9 and six and just how it's on I feel like I really just how it's on I feel like I really just how it's on I feel like I really try very hard to talk about makeup being try very hard to talk about makeup being try very hard to talk about makeup being fun and that you know I'm I'm choosing fun and that you know I'm I'm choosing fun and that you know I'm I'm choosing not to do something instead of like I not to do something instead of like I not to do something instead of like I have to restrict or something like that have to restrict or something like that have to restrict or something like that and even in language but yet my daughter and even in language but yet my daughter and even in language but yet my daughter walked up to me and said mommy do you walked up to me and said mommy do you walked up to me and said mommy do you think I'm beautiful you and I was like think I'm beautiful you and I was like think I'm beautiful you and I was like oh baby you know but it it is innate in oh baby you know but it it is innate in oh baby you know but it it is innate in us and so what are some things that we us and so what are some things that we us and so what are some things that we can do as we talk about the influence to can do as we talk about the influence to can do as we talk about the influence to help with the young boys and girls help with the young boys and girls help with the young boys and girls coming up and what message does aging coming up and what message does aging coming up and what message does aging naturally send to them well I do think naturally send to them well I do think naturally send to them well I do think that we're sending the message that we're sending the message that we're sending the message culturally that it is the prime virtue culturally that it is the prime virtue culturally that it is the prime virtue it is the most exalted the most prized it is the most exalted the most prized it is the most exalted the most prized the most sought-after thing that the most sought-after thing that the most sought-after thing that somebody can have and it's not and so I somebody can have and it's not and so I somebody can have and it's not and so I think that we've think that we've think that we've prioritized um and um really just given prioritized um and um really just given prioritized um and um really just given one or two definitions of beauty but so one or two definitions of beauty but so one or two definitions of beauty but so so I'm worried about the message that's so I'm worried about the message that's so I'm worried about the message that's going down but I've got to tell you that going down but I've got to tell you that going down but I've got to tell you that I'm also encouraged by the message I'm also encouraged by the message I'm also encouraged by the message that's that's coming up from the younger

that's that's coming up from the younger that's that's coming up from the younger generation my daughters have had such an generation my daughters have had such an generation my daughters have had such an impact on me and my ability to they are impact on me and my ability to they are impact on me and my ability to they are so body positive and they think about so body positive and they think about so body positive and they think about their bodies in such healthier ways than their bodies in such healthier ways than their bodies in such healthier ways than I ever did that I'm learning from them I ever did that I'm learning from them I ever did that I'm learning from them and it has been Redemptive in my life and it has been Redemptive in my life and it has been Redemptive in my life and so I do think that the message can and so I do think that the message can and so I do think that the message can go a lot of different directions and go a lot of different directions and go a lot of different directions and just to realize that as we all and not just to realize that as we all and not just to realize that as we all and not not just body positive to be body not just body positive to be body not just body positive to be body positive but to have the view of our positive but to have the view of our positive but to have the view of our bodies and what they are doing as we age bodies and what they are doing as we age bodies and what they are doing as we age have that view that is the the Eternal have that view that is the the Eternal have that view that is the the Eternal View and then the the you know how is it View and then the the you know how is it View and then the the you know how is it being used now and why are we even given being used now and why are we even given being used now and why are we even given a body and you know all of those a body and you know all of those a body and you know all of those questions that that need to be asked um questions that that need to be asked um questions that that need to be asked um and so I think the messages can um Can and so I think the messages can um Can and so I think the messages can um Can can go both ways we have a lot to learn can go both ways we have a lot to learn can go both ways we have a lot to learn from our younger sisters I would agree from our younger sisters I would agree from our younger sisters I would agree with that I think there's a stronger with that I think there's a stronger with that I think there's a stronger sense of um the purpose of a body in my sense of um the purpose of a body in my sense of um the purpose of a body in my daughter's generation than there was in daughter's generation than there was in daughter's generation than there was in mine I would say my generation viewed mine I would say my generation viewed mine I would say my generation viewed bodies uh women's bodies primarily as bodies uh women's bodies primarily as bodies uh women's bodies primarily as decorative um and this generation views decorative um and this generation views decorative um and this generation views them more primarily as useful which is a them more primarily as useful which is a them more primarily as useful which is a much more biblical read on on how to much more biblical read on on how to much more biblical read on on how to think about our bodies and some of that think about our bodies and some of that think about our bodies and some of that was just where the culture was at the was just where the culture was at the was just where the culture was at the time that we're coming into Womanhood time that we're coming into Womanhood time that we're coming into Womanhood and plus I live in Texas which impacts and plus I live in Texas which impacts and plus I live in Texas which impacts it it really does and so um so there is

it it really does and so um so there is it it really does and so um so there is that I think we should specify when that I think we should specify when that I think we should specify when we're talking about beauty we're we're talking about beauty we're we're talking about beauty we're speaking specifically of youthful Beauty speaking specifically of youthful Beauty speaking specifically of youthful Beauty I mean I think everyone would say I mean I think everyone would say I mean I think everyone would say someone can be beautiful at every age someone can be beautiful at every age someone can be beautiful at every age but there is a particular power and but there is a particular power and but there is a particular power and privilege that is communicated to those privilege that is communicated to those privilege that is communicated to those who maintain youthful Beauty and it's who maintain youthful Beauty and it's who maintain youthful Beauty and it's important for us to knowledge that power important for us to knowledge that power important for us to knowledge that power is what is being leveraged um and the is what is being leveraged um and the is what is being leveraged um and the the reason so in other words I'm less the reason so in other words I'm less the reason so in other words I'm less interested in the question of what you interested in the question of what you interested in the question of what you want to do I'm more interested in the want to do I'm more interested in the want to do I'm more interested in the question of why you want to do it I I question of why you want to do it I I question of why you want to do it I I should say why I want to do it I don't should say why I want to do it I don't should say why I want to do it I don't even mean to lay that on you um and so I even mean to lay that on you um and so I even mean to lay that on you um and so I think about that Seinfeld episode you think about that Seinfeld episode you think about that Seinfeld episode you may remember it where he dates this girl may remember it where he dates this girl may remember it where he dates this girl who's a supermodel and he dates her who's a supermodel and he dates her who's a supermodel and he dates her because he wants to see what she can get because he wants to see what she can get because he wants to see what she can get away with that he can't just cuz she's away with that he can't just cuz she's away with that he can't just cuz she's beautiful and so he he speeds while beautiful and so he he speeds while beautiful and so he he speeds while they're on on the highway and they get they're on on the highway and they get they're on on the highway and they get pulled over and she talks the officer pulled over and she talks the officer pulled over and she talks the officer out of giving them a ticket because out of giving them a ticket because out of giving them a ticket because she's beautiful and it's like you laugh she's beautiful and it's like you laugh she's beautiful and it's like you laugh at it's funny but you're also like nope at it's funny but you're also like nope at it's funny but you're also like nope that is true that is true and so for that is true that is true and so for that is true that is true and so for many of us um God bless those of you who many of us um God bless those of you who many of us um God bless those of you who are stunningly gorgeous in your youth are stunningly gorgeous in your youth are stunningly gorgeous in your youth because you really do feel the loss of because you really do feel the loss of because you really do feel the loss of societal power more sharply than those societal power more sharply than those societal power more sharply than those of us who are more average in appearance of us who are more average in appearance of us who are more average in appearance to as we age who knew there was an to as we age who knew there was an to as we age who knew there was an upside to looking upside to looking upside to looking average um but I I think all of us feel average um but I I think all of us feel average um but I I think all of us feel it to some degree all of us feel am I it to some degree all of us feel am I it to some degree all of us feel am I becoming invisible you know as you start becoming invisible you know as you start becoming invisible you know as you start to hit your your middle years and and

to hit your your middle years and and to hit your your middle years and and then the weird thing is and I I do want then the weird thing is and I I do want then the weird thing is and I I do want us to not only talk about appearance us to not only talk about appearance us to not only talk about appearance because the weird thing is is you because the weird thing is is you because the weird thing is is you actually move out of that phase and you actually move out of that phase and you actually move out of that phase and you go I don't actually care and I think that is what we want the and I think that is what we want the younger women in the room to know is you younger women in the room to know is you younger women in the room to know is you think this thing if you think this thing think this thing if you think this thing think this thing if you think this thing that you're losing is going to cost you that you're losing is going to cost you that you're losing is going to cost you your identity it's possible it's your identity it's possible it's your identity it's possible it's actually standing in the way of who you actually standing in the way of who you actually standing in the way of who you are becoming this brings me right to my next becoming this brings me right to my next question it was it's a good powerful question it was it's a good powerful question it was it's a good powerful line um Vanessa I want to ask you a line um Vanessa I want to ask you a line um Vanessa I want to ask you a little bit to speak to the other aspect little bit to speak to the other aspect little bit to speak to the other aspect of Aging where we it brings on like of Aging where we it brings on like of Aging where we it brings on like chronic pain disability I know as I've chronic pain disability I know as I've chronic pain disability I know as I've watched my parents age just different watched my parents age just different watched my parents age just different things um aches and pains that come on things um aches and pains that come on things um aches and pains that come on and that can feel really scary it can and that can feel really scary it can and that can feel really scary it can look scary as I look ahead and I know um look scary as I look ahead and I know um look scary as I look ahead and I know um when you're in it it's very scary and so when you're in it it's very scary and so when you're in it it's very scary and so I'm curious how are you thinking about I'm curious how are you thinking about I'm curious how are you thinking about that biblically and with that biblically and with that biblically and with hope yeah um what comes to mind when you hope yeah um what comes to mind when you hope yeah um what comes to mind when you ask that is my grandfather who was 90 ask that is my grandfather who was 90 ask that is my grandfather who was 90 plus years old and he was really super plus years old and he was really super plus years old and he was really super fit I think he didn't retire till he was fit I think he didn't retire till he was fit I think he didn't retire till he was like 83 uh from from doing manual labor like 83 uh from from doing manual labor like 83 uh from from doing manual labor I mean would get on his roof and do all I mean would get on his roof and do all I mean would get on his roof and do all these things but he used to have this these things but he used to have this these things but he used to have this phrase that he used he would say getting phrase that he used he would say getting phrase that he used he would say getting old is a blessing but it sure is

old is a blessing but it sure is old is a blessing but it sure is inconvenient inconvenient inconvenient and so he would he would say that but I and so he would he would say that but I and so he would he would say that but I I I say that to say um as Jen was saying I I say that to say um as Jen was saying I I say that to say um as Jen was saying before getting older it really does before getting older it really does before getting older it really does matter where your gaze is because if um matter where your gaze is because if um matter where your gaze is because if um um you know if you have been gazing at um you know if you have been gazing at um you know if you have been gazing at the one who has been sustaining you and the one who has been sustaining you and the one who has been sustaining you and who is faithful all of your early years who is faithful all of your early years who is faithful all of your early years if you're learning to do that if we're if you're learning to do that if we're if you're learning to do that if we're learning to do that if we're being learning to do that if we're being learning to do that if we're being discipled into learning to put our Gaze discipled into learning to put our Gaze discipled into learning to put our Gaze on Christ then we're still trusting him on Christ then we're still trusting him on Christ then we're still trusting him into those years we're trusting him um into those years we're trusting him um into those years we're trusting him um with you know the the things that come with you know the the things that come with you know the the things that come and the trials that come as we get older and the trials that come as we get older and the trials that come as we get older but I also say the other part of that is but I also say the other part of that is but I also say the other part of that is just good stewardship I think that we just good stewardship I think that we just good stewardship I think that we have to take good care of these bodies have to take good care of these bodies have to take good care of these bodies and so think yeah I mean we are a part and so think yeah I mean we are a part and so think yeah I mean we are a part of the Fall you know we we're you know of the Fall you know we we're you know of the Fall you know we we're you know we're under that the results of that um we're under that the results of that um we're under that the results of that um we see the impact of that every day but we see the impact of that every day but we see the impact of that every day but it doesn't mean that we can't do our it doesn't mean that we can't do our it doesn't mean that we can't do our very best to take good care of these very best to take good care of these very best to take good care of these bodies and so doing what we can do to bodies and so doing what we can do to bodies and so doing what we can do to Steward these bodies well to you know to Steward these bodies well to you know to Steward these bodies well to you know to eat well to exercise to do all of those eat well to exercise to do all of those eat well to exercise to do all of those things that we need to do to be you know things that we need to do to be you know things that we need to do to be you know to prevent those things as you know to to prevent those things as you know to to prevent those things as you know to as much as we are able and then the rest as much as we are able and then the rest as much as we are able and then the rest of that you know is we're we're setting of that you know is we're we're setting of that you know is we're we're setting our Gaze on the Lord and trusting that our Gaze on the Lord and trusting that our Gaze on the Lord and trusting that he'll be faithful and he is yeah I also he'll be faithful and he is yeah I also he'll be faithful and he is yeah I also think there is a real humility that has think there is a real humility that has think there is a real humility that has to come with aging and and I'm talking to come with aging and and I'm talking to come with aging and and I'm talking about things will take longer I'm slower about things will take longer I'm slower about things will take longer I'm slower my brain the some of the hardest things

my brain the some of the hardest things my brain the some of the hardest things for me are honestly brain fog like I for me are honestly brain fog like I for me are honestly brain fog like I don't think I remember well I've never don't think I remember well I've never don't think I remember well I've never really been great with names um but now really been great with names um but now really been great with names um but now I don't even remember that we actually I don't even remember that we actually I don't even remember that we actually had a conversation I mean I you and and had a conversation I mean I you and and had a conversation I mean I you and and so there is a humility with that you so there is a humility with that you so there is a humility with that you know cuz I think when when I was younger know cuz I think when when I was younger know cuz I think when when I was younger I maybe was like why are they so slow I maybe was like why are they so slow I maybe was like why are they so slow you are really going to write a check at you are really going to write a check at you are really going to write a check at the grocery the grocery the grocery store I thought we weren't going to get store I thought we weren't going to get store I thought we weren't going to get specific here sorry sorry sorry sorry I specific here sorry sorry sorry sorry I specific here sorry sorry sorry sorry I thought you were going to mention that thought you were going to mention that thought you were going to mention that video we made where I literally forgot video we made where I literally forgot video we made where I literally forgot Courtney's name while she was sitting Courtney's name while she was sitting Courtney's name while she was sitting next to it was my name Mel I forgot you next to it was my name Mel I forgot you next to it was my name Mel I forgot you I don't even remember his name I forgot I don't even remember his name I forgot I don't even remember his name I forgot which name you forgot which name you forgot which name you forgot [Applause] [Applause] [Applause] and then I called Courtney Melissa this and then I called Courtney Melissa this and then I called Courtney Melissa this morning didn't I when I was talking to morning didn't I when I was talking to morning didn't I when I was talking to you it's going fine I couldn't hear you you it's going fine I couldn't hear you you it's going fine I couldn't hear you Jen I have no idea what you said it's Jen I have no idea what you said it's Jen I have no idea what you said it's all coming out very publicly aging is all coming out very publicly aging is all coming out very publicly aging is fine oh my gosh and and you know it's fine oh my gosh and and you know it's fine oh my gosh and and you know it's it's humbling it's humbling to say I'm it's humbling it's humbling to say I'm it's humbling it's humbling to say I'm going to have needs and I know that going to have needs and I know that going to have needs and I know that those are only going to grow I mean it those are only going to grow I mean it those are only going to grow I mean it really is humbling to be slower and to really is humbling to be slower and to really is humbling to be slower and to say hey I might not have the capacity to say hey I might not have the capacity to say hey I might not have the capacity to do what I used to be able to do um and do what I used to be able to do um and do what I used to be able to do um and that's hard hard I mean there there are that's hard hard I mean there there are that's hard hard I mean there there are just some hard things but but those are just some hard things but but those are just some hard things but but those are moments to say this is my lot and while moments to say this is my lot and while moments to say this is my lot and while I choose this is the day the Lord has I choose this is the day the Lord has I choose this is the day the Lord has made well I choose to be rejoice in and made well I choose to be rejoice in and made well I choose to be rejoice in and give what I can with what I currently give what I can with what I currently give what I can with what I currently have so this body is still useful even

have so this body is still useful even have so this body is still useful even if this body can't work I mean goodness if this body can't work I mean goodness if this body can't work I mean goodness think of the life of Johnny Erics and think of the life of Johnny Erics and think of the life of Johnny Erics and Tata I mean what her life has meant to Tata I mean what her life has meant to Tata I mean what her life has meant to so many people even though her so many people even though her so many people even though her body does not do what she would like it body does not do what she would like it body does not do what she would like it to do on a daily basis and so there is to do on a daily basis and so there is to do on a daily basis and so there is still so much our bodies can do even still so much our bodies can do even still so much our bodies can do even when we might find ourselves in a rest when we might find ourselves in a rest when we might find ourselves in a rest home you know at age 90 who can I can I home you know at age 90 who can I can I home you know at age 90 who can I can I pray for the Next Generation can you pray for the Next Generation can you pray for the Next Generation can you know can I share the gospel with with my know can I share the gospel with with my know can I share the gospel with with my neighbor next door to me I mean there's neighbor next door to me I mean there's neighbor next door to me I mean there's still things if I'm here there's still a still things if I'm here there's still a still things if I'm here there's still a mission for me which is a way we can mission for me which is a way we can mission for me which is a way we can look but but there's got to be new look but but there's got to be new look but but there's got to be new humility that we might be more limited humility that we might be more limited humility that we might be more limited well and we don't turn into that well and we don't turn into that well and we don't turn into that 90-year-old woman when we're 85 right it 90-year-old woman when we're 85 right it 90-year-old woman when we're 85 right it starts with what Jen was talking about starts with what Jen was talking about starts with what Jen was talking about what we behold when we're 25 what we're what we behold when we're 25 what we're what we behold when we're 25 what we're spending our time valuing loving spending our time valuing loving spending our time valuing loving pursuing doing um perpetuating I mean pursuing doing um perpetuating I mean pursuing doing um perpetuating I mean those are the things like it matters at those are the things like it matters at those are the things like it matters at every age and Stage what we're doing and every age and Stage what we're doing and every age and Stage what we're doing and what we're valuing and what we're loving what we're valuing and what we're loving what we're valuing and what we're loving because we are not going to be the because we are not going to be the because we are not going to be the 90-year-old woman who is thrilled just 90-year-old woman who is thrilled just 90-year-old woman who is thrilled just to be praying for somebody right and I to be praying for somebody right and I to be praying for somebody right and I say just because obviously it's the it's say just because obviously it's the it's say just because obviously it's the it's the most important thing somebody can do the most important thing somebody can do the most important thing somebody can do and so um but but it doesn't just happen and so um but but it doesn't just happen and so um but but it doesn't just happen you know wake up one morning and Your you know wake up one morning and Your you know wake up one morning and Your Mother Mother Mother Teresa and I will say something about Teresa and I will say something about Teresa and I will say something about those 90y old women I'm telling you those 90y old women I'm telling you those 90y old women I'm telling you they're the most beautiful women I've they're the most beautiful women I've they're the most beautiful women I've ever seen when you when you really get

ever seen when you when you really get ever seen when you when you really get to that age and you have walked with the to that age and you have walked with the to that age and you have walked with the Lord there is a glow that no cream can Lord there is a glow that no cream can Lord there is a glow that no cream can give you and no treatment whatever you give you and no treatment whatever you give you and no treatment whatever you might do can give you um is a beauty of might do can give you um is a beauty of might do can give you um is a beauty of the spirit at work in someone I remember the spirit at work in someone I remember the spirit at work in someone I remember this my friend Debbie um she had breast this my friend Debbie um she had breast this my friend Debbie um she had breast cancer and you know cancer the radiation cancer and you know cancer the radiation cancer and you know cancer the radiation and the treatments they're horrible on and the treatments they're horrible on and the treatments they're horrible on your body um they're just horrible on your body um they're just horrible on your body um they're just horrible on your hair they're horrible on your skin your hair they're horrible on your skin your hair they're horrible on your skin they're I mean they're horrible and she they're I mean they're horrible and she they're I mean they're horrible and she was going through all that but let me was going through all that but let me was going through all that but let me say she was radiant she truly it it was say she was radiant she truly it it was say she was radiant she truly it it was so interesting as her cancer Journey had so interesting as her cancer Journey had so interesting as her cancer Journey had grown so her faith her first time at grown so her faith her first time at grown so her faith her first time at Bible study was the day she was Bible study was the day she was Bible study was the day she was diagnosed and during that Bible study diagnosed and during that Bible study diagnosed and during that Bible study she became a Christian and every day as she became a Christian and every day as she became a Christian and every day as she was walking with the Lord and she was walking with the Lord and she was walking with the Lord and knowing him more and knowing him more knowing him more and knowing him more knowing him more and knowing him more her body was dying because of the cancer her body was dying because of the cancer her body was dying because of the cancer but she was but she was but she was alive and the glow she had in the midst alive and the glow she had in the midst alive and the glow she had in the midst of dying it was just it was just of dying it was just it was just of dying it was just it was just something different so if we want to age something different so if we want to age something different so if we want to age gracefully it is looking to God that's gracefully it is looking to God that's gracefully it is looking to God that's what makes us beautiful what whatever what makes us beautiful what whatever what makes us beautiful what whatever our bodies look like the Spirit Alive in our bodies look like the Spirit Alive in our bodies look like the Spirit Alive in someone is what makes them someone is what makes them someone is what makes them glow I heard a principle that ties in glow I heard a principle that ties in glow I heard a principle that ties in with this that has stuck with me I hope with this that has stuck with me I hope with this that has stuck with me I hope this phrase will stick in your head this phrase will stick in your head this phrase will stick in your head bodies age people bodies age people bodies age people develop I want to be developing but part

develop I want to be developing but part develop I want to be developing but part of what develops me into who I'm of what develops me into who I'm of what develops me into who I'm supposed to be is the fact that my body supposed to be is the fact that my body supposed to be is the fact that my body ages and so I don't want to reject the ages and so I don't want to reject the ages and so I don't want to reject the aging process because the aging process aging process because the aging process aging process because the aging process is training me into someone and like you is training me into someone and like you is training me into someone and like you said it's an increasing dependence in said it's an increasing dependence in said it's an increasing dependence in many ways it's a walking backward from many ways it's a walking backward from many ways it's a walking backward from the way that we walked out of childhood the way that we walked out of childhood the way that we walked out of childhood right when you walk out of childhood you right when you walk out of childhood you right when you walk out of childhood you have increasing uh you have you have have increasing uh you have you have have increasing uh you have you have Limitless possibilities and increasing Limitless possibilities and increasing Limitless possibilities and increasing personal freedoms and on the other side personal freedoms and on the other side personal freedoms and on the other side of the age curve after you get past that of the age curve after you get past that of the age curve after you get past that middle- age midpoint you have decreasing middle- age midpoint you have decreasing middle- age midpoint you have decreasing possibilities and not Lim you know in possibilities and not Lim you know in possibilities and not Lim you know in limited opportunities and it continues limited opportunities and it continues limited opportunities and it continues thusly and if you live long enough your thusly and if you live long enough your thusly and if you live long enough your children will care for you in the very children will care for you in the very children will care for you in the very same caregiving ways that you cared for same caregiving ways that you cared for same caregiving ways that you cared for them when they were them when they were them when they were infants and there's actually a beauty to infants and there's actually a beauty to infants and there's actually a beauty to that now in our culture we say don't be that now in our culture we say don't be that now in our culture we say don't be a burden to your children let someone a burden to your children let someone a burden to your children let someone else handle all of that and there are a else handle all of that and there are a else handle all of that and there are a million ways to do end of life care so I million ways to do end of life care so I million ways to do end of life care so I didn't just say everybody in here needs didn't just say everybody in here needs didn't just say everybody in here needs to you know provide every element of to you know provide every element of to you know provide every element of care for an aging parent but I think care for an aging parent but I think care for an aging parent but I think it's worth us it's worth us it's worth us considering um how we think about the considering um how we think about the considering um how we think about the latter half of life because I promise latter half of life because I promise latter half of life because I promise you the culture is not um they only you the culture is not um they only you the culture is not um they only value the first half of life which is value the first half of life which is value the first half of life which is why they only value youthful Beauty why they only value youthful Beauty why they only value youthful Beauty because um it's a journey into because um it's a journey into because um it's a journey into irrelevance once you get over the the irrelevance once you get over the the irrelevance once you get over the the curve I don't care if the culture is curve I don't care if the culture is curve I don't care if the culture is saying that I do care if the Christian saying that I do care if the Christian saying that I do care if the Christian subculture is I care a lot because the subculture is I care a lot because the subculture is I care a lot because the Bible says something very different from

Bible says something very different from Bible says something very different from that it says it's a privilege to care that it says it's a privilege to care that it says it's a privilege to care for people who are returning to for people who are returning to for people who are returning to essentially a state of infancy as they essentially a state of infancy as they essentially a state of infancy as they age um it says that's a whole life age um it says that's a whole life age um it says that's a whole life pro-life ethic that's what it means um pro-life ethic that's what it means um pro-life ethic that's what it means um and it also says that um gray hair is a and it also says that um gray hair is a and it also says that um gray hair is a gift um that no one is guaranteed and I didn't just say you guaranteed and I didn't just say you couldn't dye your hair just PS in case couldn't dye your hair just PS in case couldn't dye your hair just PS in case you guys were I like to keep my gift you guys were I like to keep my gift you guys were I like to keep my gift hidden it's it's a it's a hidden it's it's a it's a hidden it's it's a it's a metaphor I cover my wisdom hide it under metaphor I cover my wisdom hide it under metaphor I cover my wisdom hide it under a bush no speaking of gray hairs that we want no speaking of gray hairs that we want to hide let's say someone out here to hide let's say someone out here to hide let's say someone out here listening wants to change something listening wants to change something listening wants to change something about their body maybe that's physically about their body maybe that's physically about their body maybe that's physically maybe that's with chronic pain and just maybe that's with chronic pain and just maybe that's with chronic pain and just something that has just been plaguing something that has just been plaguing something that has just been plaguing them for a long time how do you guys them for a long time how do you guys them for a long time how do you guys think about the line between stewardship think about the line between stewardship think about the line between stewardship and idolatry Melissa maybe you can kick and idolatry Melissa maybe you can kick and idolatry Melissa maybe you can kick us us us off I'll say I'll start with a general off I'll say I'll start with a general off I'll say I'll start with a general principle which and let me say it I mean principle which and let me say it I mean principle which and let me say it I mean clearly you know if we're suffering clearly you know if we're suffering clearly you know if we're suffering physically and in certain ways I mean physically and in certain ways I mean physically and in certain ways I mean plenty of people came to Jesus and he plenty of people came to Jesus and he plenty of people came to Jesus and he healed them yeah I mean there are healed them yeah I mean there are healed them yeah I mean there are realities of that but I think um we realities of that but I think um we realities of that but I think um we probably think wrongly about ourselves probably think wrongly about ourselves probably think wrongly about ourselves if we think that we are going to find if we think that we are going to find if we think that we are going to find contentment by contentment by contentment by attainment um you know often we think we

attainment um you know often we think we attainment um you know often we think we need to gain more to be content in need to gain more to be content in need to gain more to be content in whatever it might be and the reality is whatever it might be and the reality is whatever it might be and the reality is that this is what we were talking about that this is what we were talking about that this is what we were talking about with the bread of life right you know we with the bread of life right you know we with the bread of life right you know we think some physical thing if I only had think some physical thing if I only had think some physical thing if I only had this if I only had that then I would this if I only had that then I would this if I only had that then I would finally be content um there are some of finally be content um there are some of finally be content um there are some of us who live you know some many of you us who live you know some many of you us who live you know some many of you probably live with chronic pain and yes probably live with chronic pain and yes probably live with chronic pain and yes I would say pursue what you can to be I would say pursue what you can to be I would say pursue what you can to be free of those things but sometimes we're free of those things but sometimes we're free of those things but sometimes we're called to live with chronic pain and called to live with chronic pain and called to live with chronic pain and there there aren't treatments for there there aren't treatments for there there aren't treatments for certain things and so there are places certain things and so there are places certain things and so there are places where I think we we ask the Lord help me where I think we we ask the Lord help me where I think we we ask the Lord help me bear this in a way that honors you and bear this in a way that honors you and bear this in a way that honors you and we hold things and and you know so we hold things and and you know so we hold things and and you know so there's there are definitely right there's there are definitely right there's there are definitely right places to get help and things like that places to get help and things like that places to get help and things like that but I do think when you look at certain but I do think when you look at certain but I do think when you look at certain choices um in chasing of particularly choices um in chasing of particularly choices um in chasing of particularly Beauty things I think usually it's just Beauty things I think usually it's just Beauty things I think usually it's just going to be kind of like when we chase going to be kind of like when we chase going to be kind of like when we chase money who was it I can't remember who money who was it I can't remember who money who was it I can't remember who said it um it was like how much money is said it um it was like how much money is said it um it was like how much money is enough and they said just a little bit enough and they said just a little bit enough and they said just a little bit more who was that do you know I don't I more who was that do you know I don't I more who was that do you know I don't I don't know but I have a joke with my don't know but I have a joke with my don't know but I have a joke with my stepmother the one who lit I lit her stepmother the one who lit I lit her stepmother the one who lit I lit her hair on hair on hair on fire you noticed I wear the turquoise fire you noticed I wear the turquoise fire you noticed I wear the turquoise jewelry she gives it to me she has sold jewelry she gives it to me she has sold jewelry she gives it to me she has sold it for years as a business and whatever it for years as a business and whatever it for years as a business and whatever and so she gives me very nice things and and so she gives me very nice things and and so she gives me very nice things and she will always jokingly say I'm just she will always jokingly say I'm just she will always jokingly say I'm just trying to purchase your affection to trying to purchase your affection to trying to purchase your affection to which I always respond you're so close which I always respond you're so close which I always respond you're so close just keep on

trying and so you know I think there's trying and so you know I think there's just this you know we think if I could just this you know we think if I could just this you know we think if I could just if I could just fix whatever you just if I could just fix whatever you just if I could just fix whatever you know thing that's bothering us then we'd know thing that's bothering us then we'd know thing that's bothering us then we'd be okay and it's just never going to be be okay and it's just never going to be be okay and it's just never going to be true it's never going to be true I mean true it's never going to be true I mean true it's never going to be true I mean that's it's just so good to remember we that's it's just so good to remember we that's it's just so good to remember we are on a journey home and I always like are on a journey home and I always like are on a journey home and I always like to say if we really view this life like to say if we really view this life like to say if we really view this life like living in an airport you know when living in an airport you know when living in an airport you know when you're traveling you know things won't you're traveling you know things won't you're traveling you know things won't go quite as planned you're probably not go quite as planned you're probably not go quite as planned you're probably not going to look that cute your clothes are going to look that cute your clothes are going to look that cute your clothes are going to be wrinkled you're going to be going to be wrinkled you're going to be going to be wrinkled you're going to be tired you might be a little bit crabby tired you might be a little bit crabby tired you might be a little bit crabby but that's okay because you're not home but that's okay because you're not home but that's okay because you're not home yet you're trying to get there and so yet you're trying to get there and so yet you're trying to get there and so you expect there to be bumps and bruises you expect there to be bumps and bruises you expect there to be bumps and bruises along the way I think part of this whole along the way I think part of this whole along the way I think part of this whole discussion is we think our lives should discussion is we think our lives should discussion is we think our lives should be perfect here um we're heading home be perfect here um we're heading home be perfect here um we're heading home we're heading home and so the thing is we're heading home and so the thing is we're heading home and so the thing is to use everything we have in the days to use everything we have in the days to use everything we have in the days we're given to get home ourselves and to we're given to get home ourselves and to we're given to get home ourselves and to get other people home like that's the get other people home like that's the get other people home like that's the whole thing we're just on a journey and whole thing we're just on a journey and whole thing we're just on a journey and I think so often we're trying to build I think so often we're trying to build I think so often we're trying to build our houses in the airport um and when it our houses in the airport um and when it our houses in the airport um and when it gets uncomfortable it's because they gets uncomfortable it's because they gets uncomfortable it's because they were never meant to be built there with regard to um wanting to change with regard to um wanting to change things about ourselves I think heart things about ourselves I think heart things about ourselves I think heart posture really matters and so it's the posture really matters and so it's the posture really matters and so it's the the reasoning why you're wanting to make the reasoning why you're wanting to make the reasoning why you're wanting to make the change if it's that you're looking the change if it's that you're looking the change if it's that you're looking in the mirror and you're thinking um I in the mirror and you're thinking um I in the mirror and you're thinking um I just I really don't like me if there's a just I really don't like me if there's a just I really don't like me if there's a if there's this element of I can never if there's this element of I can never if there's this element of I can never be content with my body if there's this be content with my body if there's this be content with my body if there's this element of even self-hatred

element of even self-hatred element of even self-hatred um you know and so I I I think that um you know and so I I I think that um you know and so I I I think that those are some things that we have to those are some things that we have to those are some things that we have to deal with those are things we have to deal with those are things we have to deal with those are things we have to wrestle with truth those are things we wrestle with truth those are things we wrestle with truth those are things we have to take before the Lord and to have to take before the Lord and to have to take before the Lord and to actually address those things because if actually address those things because if actually address those things because if that's what's motivating us to want to that's what's motivating us to want to that's what's motivating us to want to change ourselves there's some inward change ourselves there's some inward change ourselves there's some inward change that needs to happen change that needs to happen change that needs to happen first I love that one of my favorite first I love that one of my favorite first I love that one of my favorite scenes in sorry just not a scenes in sorry just not a scenes in sorry just not a recommendation just talking about it um recommendation just talking about it um recommendation just talking about it um in the Barbie movie is when Barbie is on in the Barbie movie is when Barbie is on in the Barbie movie is when Barbie is on the Park Bench the bus bench and looks the Park Bench the bus bench and looks the Park Bench the bus bench and looks over at that elderly woman and says over at that elderly woman and says over at that elderly woman and says you're beautiful and was not you're beautiful and was not you're beautiful and was not expecting her to say what she said she expecting her to say what she said she expecting her to say what she said she said I know said I know said I know it and I loved that here's you know what it and I loved that here's you know what it and I loved that here's you know what like the culture's view of beauty like the culture's view of beauty like the culture's view of beauty telling a woman who could be invisible telling a woman who could be invisible telling a woman who could be invisible in our culture currently right and she in our culture currently right and she in our culture currently right and she said I know it said I know it said I know it that's because it was in order I mean that's because it was in order I mean that's because it was in order I mean you know no I'm not spiritualizing it no you know no I'm not spiritualizing it no you know no I'm not spiritualizing it no it wasn't but I want to be there because it wasn't but I want to be there because it wasn't but I want to be there because I know who I am in Christ and because I I know who I am in Christ and because I I know who I am in Christ and because I know that there is something something know that there is something something know that there is something something he does through the process that is he does through the process that is he does through the process that is beautiful that to be Sanctified to look beautiful that to be Sanctified to look beautiful that to be Sanctified to look more like Christ is beautiful I want more like Christ is beautiful I want more like Christ is beautiful I want that like I want that like I want that like I want that so I think everybody's probably had that so I think everybody's probably had that so I think everybody's probably had the universal experience or I'm about to the universal experience or I'm about to the universal experience or I'm about to really expose myself to ridicule here um really expose myself to ridicule here um really expose myself to ridicule here um of where like you buy let's say it's a of where like you buy let's say it's a of where like you buy let's say it's a tube of lip gloss and you're like this tube of lip gloss and you're like this tube of lip gloss and you're like this is it this is going to it's happening for

it this is going to it's happening for me right now me right now me right now and then you realize maybe that was not and then you realize maybe that was not and then you realize maybe that was not going to be sufficient to the need um going to be sufficient to the need um going to be sufficient to the need um but that feeling that you get right and but that feeling that you get right and but that feeling that you get right and so I guess my point would be um we don't so I guess my point would be um we don't so I guess my point would be um we don't have to take aim at the big issues let's have to take aim at the big issues let's have to take aim at the big issues let's take a look at some of the small issues take a look at some of the small issues take a look at some of the small issues that heart motive behind it is um and that heart motive behind it is um and that heart motive behind it is um and and here's the thought process it's um and here's the thought process it's um and here's the thought process it's um if I could fix the outside the inside if I could fix the outside the inside if I could fix the outside the inside would just in come in line and that's would just in come in line and that's would just in come in line and that's actually the opposite of what the Bible actually the opposite of what the Bible actually the opposite of what the Bible says about the way we're changed the way says about the way we're changed the way says about the way we're changed the way the gospel works is From the Inside Out the gospel works is From the Inside Out the gospel works is From the Inside Out not the outside in um and I think it's not the outside in um and I think it's not the outside in um and I think it's no secret that the culture at large is no secret that the culture at large is no secret that the culture at large is exploring to its extreme limits the exploring to its extreme limits the exploring to its extreme limits the question of if I change the outside then question of if I change the outside then question of if I change the outside then the inside will feel better um and as the inside will feel better um and as the inside will feel better um and as those who subscri subscribe to a those who subscri subscribe to a those who subscri subscribe to a Christian worldview we would say that's Christian worldview we would say that's Christian worldview we would say that's actually upside down and so um so no one actually upside down and so um so no one actually upside down and so um so no one wear lip gloss ever again no I think wear lip gloss ever again no I think wear lip gloss ever again no I think that there are innocent ways there are that there are innocent ways there are that there are innocent ways there are um non-consequential ways to purchase a um non-consequential ways to purchase a um non-consequential ways to purchase a tube of lip gloss and carry it out as tube of lip gloss and carry it out as tube of lip gloss and carry it out as far as you need to and you're thinking far as you need to and you're thinking far as you need to and you're thinking um and so again it goes back to what am um and so again it goes back to what am um and so again it goes back to what am I expecting this to do for me right um I expecting this to do for me right um I expecting this to do for me right um and and being realistic about what it and and being realistic about what it and and being realistic about what it can do and then there's also there's

can do and then there's also there's can do and then there's also there's never a question of just what it's going never a question of just what it's going never a question of just what it's going to do to me all of our actions have to do to me all of our actions have to do to me all of our actions have collateral benefit or harm to the people collateral benefit or harm to the people collateral benefit or harm to the people around us that's why the gospel why the around us that's why the gospel why the around us that's why the gospel why the New Testament spend so much time on the New Testament spend so much time on the New Testament spend so much time on the one anothers because there's no such one anothers because there's no such one anothers because there's no such thing as an action taken in isolation thing as an action taken in isolation thing as an action taken in isolation and so as you think through what you and so as you think through what you and so as you think through what you will or will not do um as a Christian we will or will not do um as a Christian we will or will not do um as a Christian we don't get to say well I'm just doing don't get to say well I'm just doing don't get to say well I'm just doing this for me because we recognize that this for me because we recognize that this for me because we recognize that nothing that we do is just for us and it nothing that we do is just for us and it nothing that we do is just for us and it just impacts us um and so that can that just impacts us um and so that can that just impacts us um and so that can that can help maybe give give a rather than can help maybe give give a rather than can help maybe give give a rather than give a prescription give maybe some give a prescription give maybe some give a prescription give maybe some principles to think about when you're principles to think about when you're principles to think about when you're weighing any particular decision that weighing any particular decision that weighing any particular decision that you want to make um but I do hope that you want to make um but I do hope that you want to make um but I do hope that we don't have to talk about beauty the we don't have to talk about beauty the we don't have to talk about beauty the whole time because we do have you know whole time because we do have you know whole time because we do have you know just the Aging in general um once you just the Aging in general um once you just the Aging in general um once you kind of get past the how I look part um kind of get past the how I look part um kind of get past the how I look part um I don't know I think you guys I think I don't know I think you guys I think I don't know I think you guys I think we're all feeling this I think we're we're all feeling this I think we're we're all feeling this I think we're getting to to that age of life where getting to to that age of life where getting to to that age of life where you're like this is really great and you're like this is really great and you're like this is really great and everybody led me to believe it would be everybody led me to believe it would be everybody led me to believe it would be right terrible right did you think that right terrible right did you think that right terrible right did you think that it's like raising teenagers everybody's it's like raising teenagers everybody's it's like raising teenagers everybody's like it's going to be horrible and it's like it's going to be horrible and it's like it's going to be horrible and it's the best time ever I loved it loved it the best time ever I loved it loved it the best time ever I loved it loved it third child right I mean it's you third child right I mean it's you third child right I mean it's you know you're doing okay by the way you're know you're doing okay by the way you're know you're doing okay by the way you're you're surviving um but yeah like I love you're surviving um but yeah like I love you're surviving um but yeah like I love it but I also had a little reality check it but I also had a little reality check it but I also had a little reality check by my very truths speaking youngest

by my very truths speaking youngest by my very truths speaking youngest daughter man that girl slices it thin I daughter man that girl slices it thin I daughter man that girl slices it thin I said something about being middle-aged said something about being middle-aged said something about being middle-aged and she goes how old do you think you're and she goes how old do you think you're and she goes how old do you think you're going to live to be I'm like oh I'm not middle-aged be I'm like oh I'm not middle-aged anymore okay I got it I got it like I'll anymore okay I got it I got it like I'll anymore okay I got it I got it like I'll caller you know yeah exactly 110 yes caller you know yeah exactly 110 yes caller you know yeah exactly 110 yes okay exactly not okay I mean okay exactly not okay I mean okay exactly not okay I mean man uh but yeah it's you you get here man uh but yeah it's you you get here man uh but yeah it's you you get here but I also know here because I'm just but I also know here because I'm just but I also know here because I'm just Crush I'm just a little over the middle Crush I'm just a little over the middle Crush I'm just a little over the middle I'm just a little but you know I Lord I'm just a little but you know I Lord I'm just a little but you know I Lord willing still have a ways to go between willing still have a ways to go between willing still have a ways to go between this slightly over the middle and and this slightly over the middle and and this slightly over the middle and and the end and so I you know is it scary to the end and so I you know is it scary to the end and so I you know is it scary to think about yeah right now this is great think about yeah right now this is great think about yeah right now this is great I do love this I love the freedom I love I do love this I love the freedom I love I do love this I love the freedom I love the self- forgetfulness I love I mean the self- forgetfulness I love I mean the self- forgetfulness I love I mean there's a lot I really not the there's a lot I really not the there's a lot I really not the forgetfulness that's Melissa the self forgetfulness that's Melissa the self forgetfulness that's Melissa the self forgetfulness I mean let's make it clear forgetfulness I mean let's make it clear forgetfulness I mean let's make it clear I have not lost that yet I have not lost that yet I have not lost that yet um we were going up the escalator um we were going up the escalator um we were going up the escalator earlier though when we realized I could earlier though when we realized I could earlier though when we realized I could have Babys at her which is really have Babys at her which is really have Babys at her which is really sad really but that's kind of what I do sad really but that's kind of what I do sad really but that's kind of what I do professionally so it's all work you been professionally so it's all work you been professionally so it's all work you been a six-year-old watching an infant no but a six-year-old watching an infant no but a six-year-old watching an infant no but when I was 12 she was six you know 18 when I was 12 she was six you know 18 when I was 12 she was six you know 18 she was 12 like I could have I anyway I she was 12 like I could have I anyway I she was 12 like I could have I anyway I wouldn't leave my with wouldn't leave my with wouldn't leave my with you come to my room later girls I don't you come to my room later girls I don't you come to my room later girls I don't know I don't know how to control you know I don't know how to control you know I don't know how to control you guys oh my goodness over here you know

guys oh my goodness over here you know guys oh my goodness over here you know what Laura Laura I'm going to get this what Laura Laura I'm going to get this what Laura Laura I'm going to get this train back on train back on train back on please I think there's a there was a please I think there's a there was a please I think there's a there was a transitional time for me in particular transitional time for me in particular transitional time for me in particular and um you know where going from being a and um you know where going from being a and um you know where going from being a mom of girls to being an empty nester mom of girls to being an empty nester mom of girls to being an empty nester there there felt it felt like there was there there felt it felt like there was there there felt it felt like there was a time of kind of redefining who I am a time of kind of redefining who I am a time of kind of redefining who I am and so some of that is scary I think in and so some of that is scary I think in and so some of that is scary I think in any transition there's some things any transition there's some things any transition there's some things because you're letting go but at the because you're letting go but at the because you're letting go but at the same time you're kind of leaning forward same time you're kind of leaning forward same time you're kind of leaning forward to something new and so it's uh it's an to something new and so it's uh it's an to something new and so it's uh it's an opportunity to redefine but you know opportunity to redefine but you know opportunity to redefine but you know there is also some grief associated with there is also some grief associated with there is also some grief associated with that and so there is some transition but that and so there is some transition but that and so there is some transition but once you have redefined and you're kind once you have redefined and you're kind once you have redefined and you're kind of finding your footing man there's so of finding your footing man there's so of finding your footing man there's so much Beauty in that um there's so much much Beauty in that um there's so much much Beauty in that um there's so much Beauty and there's so much freedom and Beauty and there's so much freedom and Beauty and there's so much freedom and the relationship does change um my I the relationship does change um my I the relationship does change um my I went from you know being my children's went from you know being my children's went from you know being my children's you know parent and and you know I'm you know parent and and you know I'm you know parent and and you know I'm still their parent but I went from I still their parent but I went from I still their parent but I went from I went from being the one who was just um went from being the one who was just um went from being the one who was just um you know kind of advising every step of you know kind of advising every step of you know kind of advising every step of the way all of the details of life to the way all of the details of life to the way all of the details of life to now kind of being an advisor who hears now kind of being an advisor who hears now kind of being an advisor who hears what's going on and um I get to hear you what's going on and um I get to hear you what's going on and um I get to hear you know life lived through their lenss I know life lived through their lenss I know life lived through their lenss I get to see what it is that we've put in get to see what it is that we've put in get to see what it is that we've put in them lived out and that and there's just them lived out and that and there's just them lived out and that and there's just so much Beauty in that so yeah so I so much Beauty in that so yeah so I so much Beauty in that so yeah so I would say some transition of course some would say some transition of course some would say some transition of course some fear a little trepidation with the the fear a little trepidation with the the fear a little trepidation with the the transition and letting go but the transition and letting go but the transition and letting go but the redefining and allowing that um to kind redefining and allowing that um to kind redefining and allowing that um to kind of thrust you forward to see what it is of thrust you forward to see what it is of thrust you forward to see what it is that the the Lord has for you in the new

that the the Lord has for you in the new that the the Lord has for you in the new season there's there's so much Beauty season there's there's so much Beauty season there's there's so much Beauty there so much excitement so much to there so much excitement so much to there so much excitement so much to celebrate in that I love that um you celebrate in that I love that um you celebrate in that I love that um you know when we were on our call I asked know when we were on our call I asked know when we were on our call I asked you guys this personally because I was you guys this personally because I was you guys this personally because I was like I need to sit in the seat of the like I need to sit in the seat of the like I need to sit in the seat of the learner I'm curious what your answer is learner I'm curious what your answer is learner I'm curious what your answer is to this because um I I asked you guys to this because um I I asked you guys to this because um I I asked you guys hey is it offensive to call someone an hey is it offensive to call someone an hey is it offensive to call someone an older woman the first time and a lot of older woman the first time and a lot of older woman the first time and a lot of times I feel like people always have times I feel like people always have times I feel like people always have that story of you remember the first that story of you remember the first that story of you remember the first time someone called you an older woman time someone called you an older woman time someone called you an older woman like I remember when I was like always like I remember when I was like always like I remember when I was like always the younger woman and then one day I was the younger woman and then one day I was the younger woman and then one day I was like what was that you know I was called like what was that you know I was called like what was that you know I was called that and I couldn't believe it and so it that and I couldn't believe it and so it that and I couldn't believe it and so it kind of stands out in our minds and so kind of stands out in our minds and so kind of stands out in our minds and so I'm curious if you guys um just have any I'm curious if you guys um just have any I'm curious if you guys um just have any thoughts on how do we step into aging thoughts on how do we step into aging thoughts on how do we step into aging well and even like take that as a well and even like take that as a well and even like take that as a compliment um Courtney maybe you can compliment um Courtney maybe you can compliment um Courtney maybe you can kick us off there as we do our last kick us off there as we do our last kick us off there as we do our last question she's letting me kick it off question she's letting me kick it off question she's letting me kick it off because I did I was I was in my early because I did I was I was in my early because I did I was I was in my early 40s and I was at a friend's house and 40s and I was at a friend's house and 40s and I was at a friend's house and her name's Anna Porter so I just want to her name's Anna Porter so I just want to her name's Anna Porter so I just want to call her out um and I was getting in my call her out um and I was getting in my call her out um and I was getting in my car to leave and she's like you know car to leave and she's like you know car to leave and she's like you know thank you I have so been wanting to meet thank you I have so been wanting to meet thank you I have so been wanting to meet with an older woman and I got in my car with an older woman and I got in my car with an older woman and I got in my car and I was like is she wanting me to and I was like is she wanting me to and I was like is she wanting me to connect her with one connect her with one connect her with one like what was she asking and I'm looking like what was she asking and I'm looking like what was she asking and I'm looking in the rear view I was like oh and so in the rear view I was like oh and so in the rear view I was like oh and so you know it's it's a little sobering um you know it's it's a little sobering um you know it's it's a little sobering um I'm past the point of that being I'm past the point of that being I'm past the point of that being surprising anymore uh but like I just surprising anymore uh but like I just surprising anymore uh but like I just turned in this I just wrote a Bible turned in this I just wrote a Bible turned in this I just wrote a Bible study with Hunter belis who's 20 years study with Hunter belis who's 20 years study with Hunter belis who's 20 years younger than me exactly and uh you know younger than me exactly and uh you know younger than me exactly and uh you know she loves to talk about how I'm the she loves to talk about how I'm the she loves to talk about how I'm the older Saint and I'm like well we're also older Saint and I'm like well we're also older Saint and I'm like well we're also friends right like we're

friends right like we're friends right like we're also but it is it's it's stepping into also but it is it's it's stepping into also but it is it's it's stepping into it and I think asking the question you it and I think asking the question you it and I think asking the question you know we've talked a lot about heart know we've talked a lot about heart know we've talked a lot about heart motives and it's just so important but motives and it's just so important but motives and it's just so important but asking the question too of why is that asking the question too of why is that asking the question too of why is that hard why is it hard what am I what do I hard why is it hard what am I what do I hard why is it hard what am I what do I feel like I'm losing what am I wanting feel like I'm losing what am I wanting feel like I'm losing what am I wanting to you we asked the question what do I to you we asked the question what do I to you we asked the question what do I wanting to gain but I think it's also wanting to gain but I think it's also wanting to gain but I think it's also important to say what do I fear I'm important to say what do I fear I'm important to say what do I fear I'm losing and I think that even as we have losing and I think that even as we have losing and I think that even as we have this conversation and I want to make this conversation and I want to make this conversation and I want to make sure there's time here but even as we're sure there's time here but even as we're sure there's time here but even as we're having this conversation and I've had having this conversation and I've had having this conversation and I've had several younger women say please age in several younger women say please age in several younger women say please age in front of us like we want to see this front of us like we want to see this front of us like we want to see this happen and we want to see it done well happen and we want to see it done well happen and we want to see it done well it is such a challenge and a call and it is such a challenge and a call and it is such a challenge and a call and I'm just going to say that to all of you I'm just going to say that to all of you I'm just going to say that to all of you who are older than us up here like keep who are older than us up here like keep who are older than us up here like keep aging well show us what it looks like so aging well show us what it looks like so aging well show us what it looks like so we can follow in your foot steps and we can follow in your foot steps and we can follow in your foot steps and others can follow in ours because it is others can follow in ours because it is others can follow in ours because it is like Jen said it's our actions are not like Jen said it's our actions are not like Jen said it's our actions are not done in I olation we have to do this done in I olation we have to do this done in I olation we have to do this together and we have to um understand together and we have to um understand together and we have to um understand and redefine what beauty really is I and redefine what beauty really is I and redefine what beauty really is I think there's also that wisdom issue so think there's also that wisdom issue so think there's also that wisdom issue so my dad is 84 and um I will have my dad is 84 and um I will have my dad is 84 and um I will have conversations with girls where they're conversations with girls where they're conversations with girls where they're telling me you know I have a problem I telling me you know I have a problem I telling me you know I have a problem I need help with and they start into what need help with and they start into what need help with and they start into what the problem is and I'm like I could the problem is and I'm like I could the problem is and I'm like I could complete this I know what conversation complete this I know what conversation complete this I know what conversation we're having because I've had it now at we're having because I've had it now at we're having because I've had it now at this point many times with many girls this point many times with many girls this point many times with many girls and that's fine I don't say it like oh and that's fine I don't say it like oh and that's fine I don't say it like oh hurry up and get to the punchline but hurry up and get to the punchline but hurry up and get to the punchline but it's like I'm waiting because I I know

it's like I'm waiting because I I know it's like I'm waiting because I I know this story right and it's just because this story right and it's just because this story right and it's just because I've lived 55 years and then I think I've lived 55 years and then I think I've lived 55 years and then I think about my dad who is 84 and I think if I about my dad who is 84 and I think if I about my dad who is 84 and I think if I feel this at 55 how many times has he feel this at 55 how many times has he feel this at 55 how many times has he just sat there waiting for me to finish just sat there waiting for me to finish just sat there waiting for me to finish what I'm saying uh because there's the what I'm saying uh because there's the what I'm saying uh because there's the wisdom that's given to us from God and wisdom that's given to us from God and wisdom that's given to us from God and then there's the wisdom of age which is then there's the wisdom of age which is then there's the wisdom of age which is just I've just lived longer and I've just I've just lived longer and I've just I've just lived longer and I've seen some things and that's the wisdom seen some things and that's the wisdom seen some things and that's the wisdom that the culture gives no you know it's that the culture gives no you know it's that the culture gives no you know it's like if you're not current if you don't like if you're not current if you don't like if you're not current if you don't know how to use your phone you know like know how to use your phone you know like know how to use your phone you know like my kids are already telling me how to my kids are already telling me how to my kids are already telling me how to use my phone that's fine um but that use my phone that's fine um but that use my phone that's fine um but that doesn't mean there's no wisdom to be doesn't mean there's no wisdom to be doesn't mean there's no wisdom to be offered and so I think about um when my offered and so I think about um when my offered and so I think about um when my father passes what will die with him father passes what will die with him father passes what will die with him what are the things that I will wish what are the things that I will wish what are the things that I will wish that I had asked him when I had the that I had asked him when I had the that I had asked him when I had the chance and so when you when you think chance and so when you when you think chance and so when you when you think about aging be be thinking about like about aging be be thinking about like about aging be be thinking about like keep track of that keep track of the keep track of that keep track of the keep track of that keep track of the things that you don't feel so dumb about things that you don't feel so dumb about things that you don't feel so dumb about anymore and praise the Lord for the gift anymore and praise the Lord for the gift anymore and praise the Lord for the gift of years and then think if I know this of years and then think if I know this of years and then think if I know this much who's the person who is ahead of me much who's the person who is ahead of me much who's the person who is ahead of me and let it be said of the family of God and let it be said of the family of God and let it be said of the family of God that we honored our spiritual parents that we honored our spiritual parents that we honored our spiritual parents into old age um as we're commanded to do into old age um as we're commanded to do into old age um as we're commanded to do because not just out of obligation because not just out of obligation because not just out of obligation because of the reciprocal blessing that because of the reciprocal blessing that because of the reciprocal blessing that we receive when we we receive when we we receive when we do and one thing on that maybe for do and one thing on that maybe for do and one thing on that maybe for younger people in the room is to really younger people in the room is to really younger people in the room is to really think about who you're listening to um think about who you're listening to um think about who you're listening to um it can be really tempting because maybe it can be really tempting because maybe it can be really tempting because maybe it's an easier place to find it advice it's an easier place to find it advice it's an easier place to find it advice to go to you know someone who's been to go to you know someone who's been to go to you know someone who's been married 5 years and you know who's the

married 5 years and you know who's the married 5 years and you know who's the new marriage new marriage new marriage Guru and you're Guru and you're Guru and you're like you know that might not be the best like you know that might not be the best like you know that might not be the best place to go I mean they could have place to go I mean they could have place to go I mean they could have amazing wisdom I mean I'm not I'm not amazing wisdom I mean I'm not I'm not amazing wisdom I mean I'm not I'm not just trying to Discount someone but I just trying to Discount someone but I just trying to Discount someone but I would say it would be safer to go to would say it would be safer to go to would say it would be safer to go to someone you know look at for the people someone you know look at for the people someone you know look at for the people who have been married 30 40 years you who have been married 30 40 years you who have been married 30 40 years you know go to them and say what did you do know go to them and say what did you do know go to them and say what did you do you know look to those older people I you know look to those older people I you know look to those older people I know it's they're probably not on know it's they're probably not on know it's they're probably not on Instagram talking about their marriage Instagram talking about their marriage Instagram talking about their marriage because they have because they have because they have [Laughter] [Laughter] [Laughter] wisdom but they would probably really be wisdom but they would probably really be wisdom but they would probably really be willing to sit down with you over coffee willing to sit down with you over coffee willing to sit down with you over coffee and those are the people who can say and those are the people who can say and those are the people who can say yeah I took this way too seriously I yeah I took this way too seriously I yeah I took this way too seriously I shouldn't have done this and those are shouldn't have done this and those are shouldn't have done this and those are the people that you want to listen to so the people that you want to listen to so the people that you want to listen to so actually look for the wrinkles look for actually look for the wrinkles look for actually look for the wrinkles look for the gray hairs look for the look for the the gray hairs look for the look for the the gray hairs look for the look for the people who they're they're it's they've people who they're they're it's they've people who they're they're it's they've stuck it out you know ask them look for stuck it out you know ask them look for stuck it out you know ask them look for the woman who's been walking with Jesus the woman who's been walking with Jesus the woman who's been walking with Jesus for 40 years and say what have you done for 40 years and say what have you done for 40 years and say what have you done CU my whole goal in this life is to CU my whole goal in this life is to CU my whole goal in this life is to endure to the end that's the goal that's endure to the end that's the goal that's endure to the end that's the goal that's the goal we we tempted to look for the the goal we we tempted to look for the the goal we we tempted to look for the woman who you know has has the perfect woman who you know has has the perfect woman who you know has has the perfect outfit or whatever look to the woman outfit or whatever look to the woman outfit or whatever look to the woman who's Walking With Jesus and is ahead of who's Walking With Jesus and is ahead of who's Walking With Jesus and is ahead of you and say what have you done I want to you and say what have you done I want to you and say what have you done I want to be like be like be like you that is a great spot to and thank you that is a great spot to and thank you that is a great spot to and thank you friends so much for the wisdom of you friends so much for the wisdom of you friends so much for the wisdom of wrinkles today and just of sharing we're wrinkles today and just of sharing we're wrinkles today and just of sharing we're so grateful for you

so grateful for you so grateful for you all are you looking for more trusted all are you looking for more trusted all are you looking for more trusted gospel centered resources for women gospel centered resources for women gospel centered resources for women visit TGC women.org or click the link visit TGC women.org or click the link visit TGC women.org or click the link below